My sleeping schedule lately has been highly suspect, that is to say, there hasn’t been one. The only trend is that it has been very late, even when I try to crawl into bed early, I’m caught with a thousand things flitting through my head. Like right now, I went to bed a little after midnight, and now that it’s nearly two, I threw in my towel. Then the next day, I’ll be so tired I fall asleep sitting up.
I can’t say any one thing is bothering me in particular. There’s just a lot going on. I don’t feel like I’m perfectly happy with my LSAT studying progress. I’m not sure I’m quite up to the correct amount of weight needed for climbing Baker. The loan with BECU is still chugging along very slowly because I just found out the loan rep has been sitting on my file. She saw the extension we filed with the seller and assumed that was the expected loan closing date, which is completely off because we filed the extension with double the amount of time expect for the loan to close in case something went wrong, instead of giving time for her to sit on her ass. While I understand that loan reps at BECU probably have a good amount of files to work on and she isn’t really sitting on her ass, but ignoring my file and emails for nearly two weeks doesn’t make me feel any better about whether she’s a productive BECU employee or not.
I feel like a bit of a downer right now, which makes me feel worse because I’m a huge subscriber of positive psychology. Even when things are really bad, I believe that a bit of laughter and positive thinking helps.
Last year, I went to Burning Man, and had a really good time, but then the trip home was a total nightmare. We were traveling home in a caravan of 3 vehicles, one truck kept breaking down, so we kept stopping to let things cool down, then fix, then move, then it died completely and we waited around for half a day for arrangements to be made. We ended up leaving the truck behind, the second truck split off to grab things to retrieve broken truck. I was traveling with the RV.
We were driving along after resting for the night, I was in the front keeping the driver company, when all of a sudden, we heard a loud “THWACK!” Everyone else in the vehicle was sleeping up till then and they woke up yelling, “WHAT JUST HAPPENED?” I thought we got shot at first, then I realized I couldn’t see the road because the hood was up on the windshield. Luckily Sari, our driver remained calm, and there wasn’t anyone around, we slowly pulled over to the side. We tried to get the hood back down, but it was stuck under the overhead bed which had a row of rivets so the hood couldn’t slip under. I asked Sari if she had a cookie sheet to put between the rivets and the hood, which finally helped it slide out. We had to zip-tie the hood down because it was pretty deformed from the flipping upward.
Things were pretty uneventful from there. We were happily approaching home. Then when we got to near Portland, we heard a slight pop and people around us starting honking at us and starting pointing behind us. Our trailer popped a tire, there were sparks flying. The trailer was beyond repair at that point, so we had to abandon it on the side of the freeway. It was late already so they wanted to sleep in the RV at that point and wait till day to fix the trailer.
I called the boyfriend up to come get me then. I needed to go home to work the next day. The whole drive home had been terrible, but even at the worst moment, I knew that things weren’t all that bad, not to mention, soon as that was over, everything would seem so much sweeter for a long while after. Sitting on the couch and doing nothing felt absolutely amazing almost better than I thought.
Back to happiness psychology, I just started reading 59 Seconds: Think a Little, Change a Lot, and there’s a little writing exercise I want to try. It involves writing a short bit every day for a week. Today is Thanksgiving: “Think back over the past week and list three of these things.”
1) I’m very thankful for my mom. She’s been very supportive in the whole condo buying and recently she picked out a lucky move-in date for the condo. It’s May 22, which is my lunar calendar birthday 4-20, which corresponds to the unit #420 which appraised for the value of $420k. Even though I would love to jump right into the condo soon as the loan closes, it’s nice to think about giving ourselves time to do some painting and plate replacing.
2) I’m thankful for the boyfriend who has been packing my backpacks early in the morning before we go hike. He helps me careful weight my pack with my target training weight, even though I later give him the dirty look for putting that weight in my pack while slogging up the mountain.
3)I’m thankful for the help the books and LSAT course has been providing me, while I wish I’m a bit further ahead, I feel both has been tremendous help.
bonus thanks: Yesterday, I put in the order for my dream rug:
It was spendy (read: 2k) , but I got to touch a sample of it, and it’s very much what I wanted. I pictured bare feet on the tufted fake pebbles. Little things like that bring me simple joy.